NO RESERVATIONS (2007) **1/2 For a film allegedly in no small part about gourmet cooking...these people have no sense of balance. I'm talking about the writers and production team. They bust a major heartbreaker early, a fucking stake through your heart driven by the strangely unique repetitive nature of Phlip Glass. If you wonder if they can possibly sustain it, it's because they conned you early. They have no idea what they're doing. Now, Catherine Zeta-Jones, she helped build it she coulda sustained it, and I'm guessing that Aaron Eckhart, he could have caught it all in stride when they mixed him in... But the production team resolutely refuses to even wonder if they know how. They play the culture card through opera, by playing the two songs they figure the most people will recognize, and then feel clever, that's the idea I guess. Just in case that alienates some of a desirable target demographic, they mix in a pop tune or two-not bad ones, just that they don't fit anything that came before or after. And the food...it may work for someone, but other than fish sticks it took 'em half the film to trot out anything I'd be interested in eating. Too bad it's such a terrible mix, because there are some very high quality ingredients. It had some important things to say, and hints at even knowing how to say them, until it hopelessly distracts from itself to the point where none of it is either memorable nor recognizable. Nope, some things are best before you throw 'em all in the blender.
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