SGT. BILKO (1996) **1/2 Finally, someone made a comedy about weapons test failures! Not too many actors have ever been able to make a line, when there isn't even one there, like Steve Martin. If there's the slightest kernel he leaps forth, only sometimes figuratively, in rejoicing. Unfortunately his genius is too often confined by conventions of the industry that should, more than anyone else, recognize his uniqueness. Unfortunately things are so often run by schmucks! Which reminds me that it's a film about the army. Now, I grew up around the army and so I have no difficulty understanding that at heart it's just mainly a bunch of guys who would rather have a good time. I'm willing to believe the premise of the film, what with gambling and such in the barracks. What I can't believe is that after Steve gets a highly entertaining, if not necessarily philosophical, comedy off the ground some idiots think they have to rush in and complicate things with a plot! And, of course, knowing the kind of idiots who would do such a thing, it has to be a "boy meets girl/ problems ensue" plot. Tipper Gore was right! Hollywood should be regulated (just not in the ways she thought, more like Leonard Cohen's "Jazz Police"). Martin's best moments would be sublime if they weren't so...sub...and several nice musical touches (including Travis Tritt), but what do you expect from a film featuring Dan Aykroyd as straight man.

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